ES2007S: Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

[Words in blue represent the feelings identified.]

January spells the beginning of another hectic semester, especially for students staying in halls as it is the start of the Inter-Hall Games (IHG) season. Being a resident of hall, I represented my hall in squash.  For each round (prelims, semi-finals and finals), each hall will have to send in 5 players. 3 players have to win their matches in order for the hall to win. We managed to enter finals and were aiming for the championship (since half the team are in our final year and we really wanted to win before we graduate).

On the day of finals, my team was eager to win, yet nervous (because the opponent hall has 2 really good players, of which 1 is in the school team). Despite our nerves, we knew we had to give our best shots and clinch the gold so as not to disappoint each other. Thankfully, we won the first 3 matches and  managed to bag the gold. We felt really really happy since we have been working hard towards this goal for the past 4 years and finally managed to attain it. Since we had already won, according to the rules of IHG, we were allowed to give up the last 2 matches so that it'd be a walkover to the opponents' hall. So since our last player has an Inter-Varsity Badminton match the next day, we requested to the opposing hall for a walkover for the last match, but gave them the option as to whether or not they wanted to play the fourth match. They agreed to play the fourth match, and to let the last match be a walkover.

After the last match was played and we were done with all the cheers with the supporters, the captain of the opposing team approached us. She must have been feeling disappointed and upset about her team's loss because based on the line-up (a line-up is the order in which the 5 players of each hall would be playing their games) of the matches, the bets were that their hall would win (even my team thought so!).  She told us that she was disappointed in us that we didn't want to play the last match, and that she felt that we didn't have sportsmanship. Hearing that, I was perplexed because when we made the request to give up on the last match earlier on, she did not raise any objections. But now that the dust has settled, she came over to raise her unhappiness, which I though was preposterous as she should have voiced out her opinions earlier. So I tried to reason with her that she should have told us earlier that they wanted the last match to be played, in which case we may continue on with the last match. Besides, it is stated in the rules that we were allowed to walkover the matches. To these, she retorted: "But you've already stated your reason for not wanting to play the match, how can we insist on playing? Anyway, no hard feelings, I'm just stating what I feel. I just think that you don't have sportsmanship." Urged by my friend to stop arguing with her since people don't normally speak rationally when they are emotional, I ended the conversation with: "Okay, you've stated your feelings and I've stated mine, so let's leave it."

Having reflected on this scenario many times, I know that I didn't feel anger towards her, just some confusion because I didn't expect her outburst, and maybe a little indignation towards her accusations. As for her, I'd expect her to feel sad because it has been a really long time since their hall performed this well for squash and I think that they had really expected themselves to win. I could also feel that she was emotional during our conversation, but it didn't feel like anger or sadness to me. 

So my question would be: What emotion do you think she was feeling during our conversation, and why?